Monday, December 31, 2012

#reverb 12 day 30: what can I celebrate about me

Day 30 Question:
Often we see our life as a humongous journey, and we believe that not only have we not arrived at our far away desired destination, but we also think we must accomplish x, y, and z, before we can declare with satisfaction that we are THERE.

For a moment, take a close look at who you are NOW. See what you can declare.

Merge the past, present, and future into one big ARRIVAL.

Describe joyously and in great celebration the BEING that you ARE.

(If you like, try writing this in third person as if you were a news reporter and this article about you is appearing in a publication you love and respect.)

2012 was a hectic but joyful year for Jess. She welcomed her fourth baby into her family. She now juggles wedding planning for her February wedding with raising 4 boys aged under 8 yrs.

2013, will see Jess throw studying business into the mix as well as running her own business.

She is looking forward to celebrating her love and relationship, with family and friends. She hopes the day is as unique as she and her partner are.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

#reverb12 Day 29: Have you heard your word?

Day 29 Question: 
What word did you select to be your travelling companion in 2012? What gifts did this word bring?
What word will you choose to guide you through 2013? What do you hope it will bring into your life?

 Cherish was the word for 2012, I had to cherish each moment, no matter how small and insignificant.

For 2013 i think peace and love are the words i'd like to guide me in to 2013.  I continue to learn the mindful ways in relationships. Mindfulness is huge in buddhism, but even if you are not a buddhist I think it is something everyone should learn and use in everyday life. Basically the mindfulness rules are:
Pay attention on purpose
Pay attention in the present moment
Pay attention non judgmentally

I hope I learn to be better at the mindfulness rules in 2013, as I feel it can help in everyday life when dealing with others even if I disagree with them or they say horrid things about me,

I think the main word would be Mindfulness for 2013.

In the practice of tolerance, one's enemy is the best teacher. Dalai Lama 

Friday, December 28, 2012

#Reverb12 Day 28: Overcoming Those Fears

Day 28 Question:
Think of three things that daunted you in 2012: how are you going to work towards overcoming them in 2013?

I have a fear of needles, yes it is a bit odd considering I have a few facial piercings (I used to have more piercings but took them out) , I had to face that fear daily for about 6 weeks this year. The good thing is I no longer pass out from the sight of them. But having injections pretty much daily and cannulas put in every 3 days and blood taken every 3 days you end up having to suck it up and just deal with it.

Another fear I had this year was of my csection, it frightened me. I knew the risks of my csection and my mind played so many what if scenarios in my head, the biggest fear I had was I would have to be put under a general anesthetic. Luckily that didn't happen and when things did start to take a turn for the worse the OB was on to it quickly to fix it.

My other fear would be a fear I have for my mum, I often fear her mental health will end up killing her, I have had that fear since I was 10. So for almost 20 years.

My way of overcoming these fears and any others in 2013, will be just to face them head on.

“If you have fear of some pain or suffering, you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it. If you can, there is no need to worry about it; if you cannot do anything, then there is also no need to worry.”
~Dalai Lama

#Reverb12 Day27: How I will honor my creativity

Day 27 Question:
How did you make time for creativity in 2012?

Looking back, is there one creative time or one particular creation that stands out for you? (Maybe you could share it here?)

How will you continue (or start) making time and space for your creative passions in 2013?

I tried to cram in unscheduled time to see etc it resulted in projects going unfinished due to not getting time again for ages. I have concluded 2013, will have scheduled set time for sewing.

Looking back in the past I was more creative pre-Kids. I was in theatre productions, fringe festivals, I socialized with a lot of people who were creative , musicians, actors, street performers, circus performers, writers, artists... I was surrounded by creativity but as the years went by everyone drifted away to new places or new ventures.

some of the crystals
pic of the dress minus waistband
My most recent creation is a tutu dress that has several layers of tulle, stretch lace, ribbon and chiffon in it. It also has 240 Swarovski crystals in 3 shades of pink on it, the crystals took me hours to put on.although I still haven't finished the waistband yet and I need to fix the straps as it turned out they were too tight, so it's not quite finished. I have enjoyed making it.

2013, will see more things being made with the launch of my label Akira. So scheduling time will be essential.

the waistband

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Christmas snippets

#reverb12 Day 26: How will you make time?

Day 26 Question:
How do you intend to carve out more time for the things that are the most important to you in 2013?

  I think next year will be the year of friends and family. Making time for those around me and hopefully they will make time for me.

I think just stopping and smelling the roses is needed in my life, just pausing every now and then, rather then going full stop living etc and never stopping to just think wow  and appreciate everything..

To make time I need to be more organised... yes the one thing in life I struggle with and always have hahha

I intend to start a blog planner (i have been eyeing off this one actually )  I also will need to schedule time to blog, to study , to do chores etc in 2013 so I will need :
a blog planner 
a small business planner
a household family planner
2013  monthly calendars 
Student Planner

I do use Cozi as a computer back up but I also like to have a book format infrount of me at times.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

#Reverb12 Day 25: How Will I Be Vulnerable

Day 25 Question:
How will you be vulnerable?

The soft white underbelly, the flaw in the armor, the Achilles' heel -- weaknesses are what make us the most human, the most beautiful.

Next year, how will you tend to your vulnerabilities? How will you build them a shelter from the storm? How will you put them through physical therapy? How will you find a way to make them work to your advantage?

I think my vulnerability would be for many, I've been left to my own devices and left out or forgotten when it comes to family things, things like deb balls, engagement parties, birthday parties etc. I'm not invited. I often put on a brave face about it, make jokes but it does hurt. It makes me feel like I'm an orphan almost. Because of this I've learnt to not rely on others. If I need to do something I do it myself rather then ask for help, because I learnt growing up usually the people you ask to help will not want to help or they will do a half hearted attempt and bitch about having to help you behind your back.

How will I tend to this vulnerability? I guess I will remind myself , I can pick my friends but not my family, and friends are often more like family then actual family. So I will surround myself with people who actually want to be in my life, people who want to be in it out of choice not because they feel obligated due to being related,. People who encourage me, support me, cheer me on as much as I encourage, support and cheer for them.

How will I build a shelter from the storm? I guess, just make sure my friends are there for me when I need them.

How will I put them through physical therapy? I will embrace friendships and strengthen them.

How will I find a way to make them to work to my advantage? I think the only advantage would be if I was to become a foster carer or a youth worker or some sort of mentor to youth in care, I have been a mentor in the past where I mentored children who's parents had a mental illness. I would like to foster teens when my boys are teens. I know some people think "ohh why would you want to foster teens? They could be dangerous or on drugs etc"
Many teens are just scared and lonely in the system. No one wants to really foster them because they aren't little. So that's my goal one day it's a good 13+ years away but I will get there one day.

#Reverb12 Day24: My most important habit

Day 24 Question:
What is the single most important habit you intend to cultivate in 2013?

I intend to blog more without Reverb I probably wouldn't be blogging everyday. I have been looking at making or buying a blog planner so I can plan posts etc. just be more organised with the blog. But I guess the chaos of my blog does reflect on how I am in real life and there is always a method to my madness, haha.

I also intend to not hold people at arms length when it comes to how I feel or think about things, out of fear I will upset or offend. To an extent, I have the flaw of being a people pleaser and a peace keeper. I try to avoid conflict unless its a last resort.

I also intend to make time for me. So I guess my habit overall is "look after myself and work on myself make time for me, and blog more" .

Sunday, December 23, 2012

#Reverb12: Day 23: what I will let go of

Day 23 Question: 
Name three excuses -- stories you tell yourself that are holding you back -- that you are going to let go of in 2013.

I often get told I need to speak up, speak louder because I am such a quiet spoken person, because of this I often think people won't hear me when I voice my opinion on matters. But once, a teacher said to me "the smallest voices often make the loudest noise and biggest impact on the world".

I often worry that I will be like my mum, she has several mental illnesses. I've come to Realise worrying that I may or may not develop a mental illness is silly.i should just live life as much as possible and just not be afraid to seek help if I need it.

I often worry my dreams will be nothing more then dreams, but I've vowed to myself that I will work towards them no matter how small a step I take its one step closer to my dreams.

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Bloggers Boogie: End of the world list

#reverb12 Day 22: The most important gift?

Day 22 Question:
What was the greatest gift you received in 2012? What was the greatest gift you gave?
What do you intend to give yourself in 2013?

 I think the best gift I got this year was priceless, it was the gift of time.  Simply taking the time to pop over to see how I was, or the time to call etc.  Though Cass (my SIL) would also bring cupcakes, her cupcakes are awesome, I keep saying she needs to make a cupcake shop.

I think the best gift I gave this year would probably be all the collingwood merchandise I have purchased and wrapped up for Allan. Not for christmas, or his brithday this was just because I could.  I just like seeing his face when he is truly surprised.

In 2013 I think I will give myself happiness.  I want to give to more charities with both my time , money and things i do not need anymore.  I would also like to buy myself a thermomix but I will have to save my coins for that.

Friday, December 21, 2012

#reverb12 Day 21: What's on the dream list?

Day 21 Question:
What items did you tick off your dream list in 2012? What other, unexpected, dreams came to fruition?
What are the top three items on your dream list for 2013?
 My dreams this year were to be happy, healthy and to have a healthy baby at the end of pregnancy. I also had the dream of moving somewhere where I can have a house on a block big enough to have a huge veggie garden and fruit trees and chickens etc and be sustainable, or the start of being sustainable. I also had the dream of getting my drivers license this year (yes I know 26 years old and I still don't have my license but honestly I have never actually needed it i do have a learners permit thats it).

I got my healthy baby and my health stayed great this year. I did not get my license or my sustainable house. But I did work towards my license so maybe next year I can go for my license.  I have researched which areas would have the types of house I am dreaming of, so I know where to look now.

Unexpected dreams, i would say would be the dream of getting married. After being engaged since 2007 you kind of expect it to be that way forever.

My top 3 dreams for 2013 are:

1) Study-   I am starting a Certificate IV in Business (sales) in the new year, if all goes well I should have this finished in 6-8 months. I also plan to enrol in  Advance Diploma of Applied Fashion & Technology this is  a full time 3 year course and to get into it, I need a folio so I plan to do a tafe level workshop on how to make a portfolio which is a 4 week course or thereabouts.  So if my plan goes well I should be doing the Advance diploma in 2014.

2) I want to have my own business and be self employed.

3)  Continue working towards Sustainability in as many areas I can.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

#reverb12 Day 20: What was lost and what was found?

Day 20 question:
What was lost in 2012? What do you intend to find in 2013?
I guess I lost a few friends, gained some new ones. Lost a few family members who chose to not want to be in my life.  But I think I found more of myself this year, parts of me i had lost over time but found again.
I hope to find more of me next year.
I'd like to be more authentic and true to myself, i don;t care fi this means i am not a people pleaser, or if i offend others in doing so. I figure I can not please everyone , so might as well please myself.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Ad Free Blog

By using this icon on my website I am stating...
1. That I am opposed to the use of corporate advertising on blogs.
2. That I feel the use of corporate advertising on blogs devalues the medium.
3. That I do not accept money in return for advertising space on my blog.
(For more info on the ad free blog icon check out this link)

#Reverb12 Day 19: How I nourished Myself

Day 19 Question:
How did you nourish your beautiful body in 2012?
What self-care practices will you take with you into 2013?

 During 2012, I paid more attention to what my body needed when it comes to diet, emotional well being etc.  I took up yoga once again.  I read Buddhism for mothers (great book I can not say how awesome it is enough).
      I think the fact, I am big on the whole love yourself inside and out, helped a lot when it comes to the csection birth of Alistair. I could be down in the dumps about the scar or the fact theres a slight overhang bit now, but i honestly don't care. I have had 4 babies, my body has changed since i was a teen, as it should because I am far healthier now then when i was a teen.

I try to live by this, sometimes I have to remind myself
but I am human after all.
For nourishing myself inside, I tried to eat as healthy as possible, though many will attest to the fact I am open about consuming a lot of junk food (dr pepper cherry is one of my favourite drinks)  that area is something I know I should work on, but I took it one step at a time. I looked at where i lacked things in my diet and added things that were Low GI high protein etc, i added as much fruit and vege as possible.  i am still a work in progress as you can tell. I want to one day kick the white stuff (refined sugar), I am caffeine free though (yes i will break it randomly to have a dr pepper haha).

For nourishing myself emotionally, I really had to focus on removing the toxic people in my life , who are there to do nothing but be toxic and just plain awful.

Nourishing myself mentally, well I started this blog. I love to write. I could write anything 24/7. I also have tried to nourish my life, my relationships with others. because this helps nourish me internally.

To nourish myself outside, I try to use natural based products.  One of my favourite blogs Little Eco Footprints has heaps of blog posts with recipes on sustainable skin care (check this link out) . Its another work in progress but I plan to try and make things for my skin next year more often.  I also have read all the awesome uses for coconut oil and hope to use that more too to nourish myself.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

#Reverb 12 Day 18: The colour of me

Day 18 Question:
What colour best represents the year you had in 2012? And why?
What colour would you like to invite into your life in 2013? 
Be as literal or metaphorical, clever or crazy, or just plain off-the-wall with this as you choose! Can't wait to read your responses to this one!Be as literal or metaphorical, clever or crazy, or just plain off-the-wall with this as you choose! Can't wait to read your responses to this one!

I think my colour for 2012 is (or was ) Blue. I actually looked up the colour meaning of Blue and found this page

It says:
Put some blue in your life when you want:
  • calm and relaxation to counteract chaos or agitation
  • to open the flow of communication
  • to broaden your perspective in learning new information
  • solitude and peace

Wearing Blue

Wear dark blues for a stable, calm conservative feeling. All shades of blue will help to make easy communication, whether it is with yourself or others. Use blue paper for notes when you want help in remembering a speech or other information.

Chakra associated with Blue:

Blue is the color associated with the Throat Chakra. This chakra deals with communication of how we feel and what we think.
I guess it was my colour this year because I sought out peace and spirituality more this year, i also sought out as much relaxation as possible.

Now the colour, I want more of in 2013 is Yellow and Green.

 The meaning of green is here in this link. It says:
Put some green in your life when you want:
  • a new state of balance
  • feel a need for change or growth
  • freedom to pursue new ideas
  • protection from fears and anxieties connected with the demands of others

Wearing Green

Wear green when you want to overcome a sense of thwarted ambition. Green says growth - balance - harmony. It is a color of healthy relationships.

Chakra associated with Green:

Green is the color associated with the Heart Chakra. This chakra deals with higher consciousness and love. 

Now The meaning of Yellow is here 
It says:
Put some yellow in your life when you want:
  • clarity for decision-making
  • relief from 'burnout', panic, nervousness, exhaustion
  • sharper memory and concentration skills
  • protection from lethargy and depression during dull weather

Wearing Yellow

Wear yellow to present a cheery, uplifting effect. Use it around your office to help keep a clear your mind, and improve memory and decision making.

Chakra associated with Yellow:

Yellow is the color associated with the Solar Plexus Chakra. This chakra deals with identity. 

Monday, December 17, 2012

#reverb12 Day 17: How did you make a difference?

Day 17 Question:
Think of one person whose life you made a difference to in 2012.
What did you gain from this?
How will you continue to make a difference in 2013?

 I wouldn't have a clue who i have changed in 2012 or made a difference with. I just go along me way being me. I don't want to gain anything out of it. Just like how this blog has no sponsors because I don't want to make anything from it. I plan to continue being me in 2013.

"The problem isn't materialism as such. Rather it is the underlying assumption that full satisfaction can arise from gratifying the senses alone. Unlike animals whose quest for happiness is restricted to survival and to the immediate gratification of sensory desires, we human beings have the capacity to experience happiness at a deeper level which, when achieved, can overwhelm unhappy experiences."-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

#Reverb12 day 16: who inspired me

Day 16 Question:
Who inspired you in 2012? And why?
What gifts did they give you? And how will you carry these forward in to 2013?

Aaron on christmas day in 2005 or 2006.
Allan is in the background.
Aaron with Cody in 2006
I guess I was inspired by a few different people this year: my brother Aaron (who passed away in 2007), my friend Cel, my friend Tess, my partner Allan and there is probably others but I'm just going off the top of my head.

One of the biggest lessons Aaron taught me and a lot of others was don't judge a book by its cover, Aaron was a bit of a gothic who had several piercings and occasionally wore eye make up, but underneath all that outward appearance he was the same cheeky boy I grew up with.

Aaron also taught me, life can change in an instant. He was also a dreamer, if someone said "wouldn't it be cool if I did this..." He would be the cheer squad saying do it, what are you waiting for ?

Cel, is amazing. She was always not far away via text or phone even though she was often going through a tough time herself. She was one of the first people who taught me about GF/CF diet and bio med treatments. (Cel if you read this you really are awesome )

I look forward to seeing Cel at my wedding. I also think 2013 shall be the year of recipe swapping (Hint Hint)

Tess has been my friend since high school, we met in year 10 Indonesian class. We were probably unlikely ever to become friends had we not met that day. We both have a twisted sense of humour .

I look forward to more jokes from Tess and catching up with her sometime.

Allan inspires me in so many ways. 2013 will be the year we say I do. Celebrating our love for one another.