Sunday, December 22, 2013

Reverb13: Day 21: On our last day

2014 is going to be MY YEAR because...

In 2014, I am going to do...

In 2014, I am going to feel...

In 2014, I am not going to...

In December 2014, I am going to look back and say...

For bonus points, if you participated in #reverb12, compare your answers to the ones you wrote this time last year. What has been revealled? Where are the surprises?

Last year I was in Reverb12 my post this time last year is here

2014 is going to be MY YEAR because:  I will take time to care for me as well others, I will be more mindful.

2013 answer: "I am getting married !! and I plan to make it a year of possibilities and cease the moment."

In 2014, I am going to do:  Study and hopefully return to work, and  just be peaceful & happy. i hope to be more community minded and help out in the community as much as I can.
2013 answer:  " Study and start my own business and be a mum, be me. Get married so , become a wife. I will be juggling lots of job descriptions haha"

In 2014, I am going to feel: Peace and compassion. Happiness.
2013 answer:  "Happy and i mean REALLY happy.  No one and I mean no one will be raining on my parade."

In 2014 I am not going to:  worry about the past or future I will live for the now.
2013 answer:  "Put up with liars,toxic individuals or the drama those two types bring with them. I also wont tolerate bullshit. I also wont be a people pleaser."

In December 2014, I am going to look back & say:  Wow this year has gone fast  what an amazing year! 
2013 answer:  ""Where the F**k did the year go?!" haha  nah, I will be proud of how i go there and what I have accomplished in 2013 and look forward to 2014."

I guess for me i predicted a few things for 2013 before they even occurred, which is surprising. 

reverb 13: Day 20: The way forward

Forward is the only direction.

The mirror never lies, but everything in it is backwards. 

Look at what you see in the mirror. How does it change if you view yourself with eyes that can only look forward?

I didn't create this but I love it. 

Friday, December 20, 2013

Reverb13: day 19: self compassion

The Buddha said, “You, yourself, as much as anybody else in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

In the past year, I have been on a mission to understand and practice self-compassion, which is sometimes defined as "extending compassion to one's self in instances of perceived inadequacy, failure, or general suffering," and what I have learned has made me realize that this practice is at the heart of everything. 

How will you practice self-compassion?

Sometimes, in our busy life, we forget about loving ourselves. we put our needs last.  Mothers often do this. i could write for hour on how self esteem and body image is self love etc. but i think whatever you do, you need to do things that make YOU happy. stuff that makes you truly happy, that is true self love. 

In my high school years I got bullied for being a short kid, for being skinny. i heard every joke about thin people over the years. I am just one of those people who no matter what is stuck buying clothes in the kid section, i am 27 years old  with 4 children but i get my own clothes from the kids section haha. It took me ages to realise, i was fine the way i am. 

I realised earlier this year, i am harder on myself then anyone else is on me. i am my worst critic. I strive for perfection in my studies & try to be perfect in other things. But , I am human, I can not be perfect. 

In 2014 i will strive to be mindful and  get back into yoga, i need to look after myself.

Reverb13:Day 18:Peace

I am often surprised where I find peace, it is usually in the midst of chaos.

In the midst of living, did you find moments to breathe? Were there moments that held you in the embrace of peace and quiet and pure contentment? 

Did these moments catch you by surprise or did you create the space for peace to find you?how will you make space for greater peace in 2014? Because it’s hard to imagine anything more important.

I think for me i found quick moments of peace and calmness when I did yoga, i stopped doing it for a while an felt the flow on effects in the rest of my life areas. Yoga is so helpful for me, for both relaxation and just taking the time to  have that moment of calm , that quiet moment alone. 

I also find contentment among the chaos, it is strange but my mantra is "there is a method to my madness, i just don't know what it is yet" haha

Peace is actually my word for 2014. i think to be truly peaceful you need to be mindful.  (check this link for info on mindfulness), I find it really helps me. At times i do need to remind myself that others are not as mindful at time. Hell, even I am not mindful all the time. But I'm working on it.

<---i found this awesome quote and fell in love with it so i have to share it. I think i would love to o my own version of this on a canvas  with  blues and greens instead of red and orange.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

reverb13 : day 17: its my word

What word did you select to be your travelling companion in 2013? What gifts did this word bring?

What word will you choose to guide you through 2014? What do you hope it will bring into your life?

My 2013 word was Compassion.  By being compassionate to others you can really see things from their point of view even if they are being utter jerks to you.  Mindfulness and compassion can go a long way in life.

I think the word also led me to choosing to study Community services.

I think my word for 2014 will be Peace. I think this because I try to avoid conflict, its my nature, and i like to fix things. If i can be the peace keeper for something i will. I hope for it to just make 2014 a smooth sail. 

reverb 13: Day 16: Habits & addictions

Habits and addictions, some are silly, some serious; when we have issues without answers, they can hold us so tight that we stop moving forward with the life we intended.

Were you able to loosen those fetters this year, and if you were successful, how did you manage it? Did you accept outside help, or work alone?

If you still feel that grasp of addiction or hurtful habits, what will you do differently in the year to come?

I have a facebook addiction.  I have taken a few breaks from being online over the course of 2013, my plan for 2014 is to schedule designated time frames for things such as blogging and facebook.  I tend to not seek help for it, but i don't know its not that bad to the point i need an intervention, haha.

I think maybe I just need someone to say "jess get the hell off facebook go do something like study "

Reverb13: Day 15: Sensory Highlights

Give us a sensory tour of 2013. How would you describe the year that’s passing in terms of:


When I think of sensory things I think food. The food I have had this year some has been great (thank you pinterest ) some well they were utter failures....
one thing i have grown to love and almost become addicted to is Bliss balls here is one of my fave recipes

Sound wise I have loved slow mellow music, like this: i walked down the aisle to this  
That is all I can think of for now.

Reverb13: Day 14: Decisions

What was the best decision you made in 2013? What were the results? How will you continue the good work in 2014?

I think the choice to study was a great choice I have made in 2013. I have learnt so much  along the way not only about myself but also about the industry I am studying.   I tend to think , you are never to old or young to chase  a passion, to realise your dream. But if you never try then that is just silly. 

I also got married in Early this year, that was another choice I made.  

My choices for 2014, i think will be more about mindfullness and community. I want to  focus on helping others and helping them reach the best they can be. 

Reverb13: day 12: Turning Mud into Gold

Somehow i missed day 12 lol who knows how that happened but here it is.

I'm a big fan of muddy experiences. They become our greatest teachers when we're wise enough to exfoliate with them; roll around in the deep until we finally feel ready to get clean. 

Today, identify something muddy that kept recurring for you throughout 2013, and then ask yourself this: What's the clear truth underneath this damn mud if I finally wash myself clean?

I think for me 2013, has taught me that I am capable of being a lone wolf. That underneath all that muddy crap i have dealt with,  people seem to wish they were like me. Some wish they had what i have, some are just plain old green eyed monsters.
The reality is the grass isn't always greener.  

2013  has taught me I am one of the biggest advocates for my children.  And I am a vocal person in general, I will tell you what you need to hear whether you like it or not. 

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Reverb 13: Day 13 Alchemy

The phrase “It takes a village” is often bandied about, in reference to child-rearing, running a business, just about everything. But if you’re anything like me, you may not be a natural born collaborator.

In 2014, how could you explore what community means to you?

It might be a question of sharing the load, asking for help or signing on someone with a complementary skill set. Or it could be about a creative collaboration that pushes you to explore new ideas and media.

Where might the alchemy be?

In 2014, i will be learning about community from a social worker point of view, via a work placement and also from my studies. To me, since I live in a city that has more then 38 ethnic groups  and a large population , I would like to learn about Diversity in the community & how this works (or in some cases doesn't work).

I also run a local support group for parents/carers of special needs children this is based online.   This has created a network of support and also has people from within the disability sector in the group. It is a great resource for parents. I never actually thought it would become this large.

I guess for me, 2014 will be the year where I take time to help everyone and anyone who needs it. I tend to think that people come into your life for a reason, although the reason or lesson is not always easily seen or understood straight away , time reveals it eventually.

Reverb 13: Day 11: Boldy Go

What challenges lie ahead in 2014? How might you meet them boldly? 

I am going to be working (hopefully ) so i will be going through all the challenges of the work place, as well as   being a mum of 4.  3 of the boys will be at school next year. With our youngest about to turn 17 months i suspect soon he may start getting to that terrible two stage soon, haha.

I also will be doing the work placement required for my Diploma of Community Services, next year.   So I will be juggling student life with work life and family life.  That juggling may prove to be a bit of a challenge but I know it will be all worth it in the end.

Reverb 13: Day 10 Auto- Pilot

Living life on auto-pilot can feel disorienting and dull. How did you cultivate a life worth loving during 2013?

How can you turn off your auto-pilot button in 2014?

I think taking time to reconnect with people, ourselves and just doing thing that aren't in our comfort zone etc can help break that auto-pilot habit. 
As a busy mum of 4 little boys, my auto-pilot is get up early in the morning, make breakfast , get the boys bathed & dressed, pack school bags and then  do readers etc.. Somehow i do this before 8:30am haha
But next year I am hoping to be a working mum, so  hubby will be a stay at home dad, a role reversal.
I am still studying.  Last night I managed to hand in 5 assignments in the space of about 2 hours.

Monday, December 9, 2013

Reverb13 day9 inspiration

Who inspired you in 2013? And why?What gifts did they give you? And how will you carry these forward in to 2014?

My friend cel inspired me this year.  She is an amazing strong woman & mum.  She was the one who made me realise  doing stuff for myself isn't selfish, it's something we need to do to look after ourselves and not go insane. 

She has been encouraging me to dye my hair which I'm yet to do but either later this month or in early 2014 my hair will look like this: 

Cel if you're reading this you're amazing ! Love ya guts! 

Sunday, December 8, 2013

Reverb13 day8: what went right?

What went right in 2013?

Maybe you didn't quit smoking or lose those pounds or go to Paris, but something did work, did happen, and/or was realized. What was it?

This year Cody (my first son now aged 8) was diagnosed with ADHD, aspergers & auditory processing disorder. Previously to this he only had been diagnosed with sensory processing disorder.  So this year I've finally been able to demand the education department support him. He is also gifted so his IEP (individual education plan) carers to both ends despite the school at this stage getting zilch in funding for his extra needs. 

Tyson (my second son now aged7)was diagnosed with ADHD early this year and 2014 will see him being assessed for aspergers. So he has been given supports as well at school. 

Both boys are waiting for ndis to organise funding for them. But 2014, is looking like they will both be fully supported.

We also moved house in March, we now live around the corner from the school the boys go too.  Now that our rental is on the market we may have to move again in March when our lease ends. 

Charlie (my third son now aged 5)attended kinder links which got him familiar with the school and the prep teachers. I still can't believe he will be starting school next year! 

This year I completed a certificate IV in business sales, I started a diploma in community services in November.  So my studying has gone right. 

2013, has taught me that even if life doesn't go to plan, it still works out okay. 

Saturday, December 7, 2013

Reverb13: day 6 : memories


“True wisdom lies in gathering the precious things out of each day as it goes by.”— E.S. Bouton

There are so many “precious things” that are presented to us each day; discoveries and treasures found in simple moments, memories we wish to store in our hearts and keep with us forever.

What precious things have you gathered in 2013?

Which memories from this year do you wish to keep with you always?

Alistair started walking early this year, he was 9 months. It seems like so long ago since he now runs everywhere! Haha!

I got married in February. The photographer caught some candid moments like the moment Allan's ring was missing( we did find it). 

This photo was taken last night before the boys school concert. 
Alistairs birthday cake
Beach trip. 
Missing wedding ring.
Tyson loosing frount teeth.

Reverb13 day7: revealing my self(ie)


Please post your favourite picture of yourself from 2013, self-portrait or otherwise!

My friend cel(also one of my bridesmaids) took this while we were traveling to the ceremony, on my wedding day. 

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Reverb13: day 5 Risk

Prompt :
What was the greatest risk you took in 2013? What was the outcome?

I started a bachelor of early childhood education then decided to take a year off, to see if it was what I really wanted to do. 
Since then, I've started a diploma of community services and I feel more at home in this course then I did in the early childhood one. I feel like this course I am in now suits me more, that I've find something I'm truly passionate about.

I have only done the first unit of the community services course so I am still a new student. But I plan to also do a diploma in youth justice, next year and also then study art therapy. 

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Reverb13 day4: grief

Prompt :

This past year, we have all experienced so much loss and experienced so much grief -- in relationships, through sickness and death, from mental illness or abuse, because of finances, even due to the need for healthy change.

It is good to honor those shifts, to fully feel them, so that we can let go of what needs surrendered, and remember what is worthy of our love and gratitude.


What have you lost, what are you grieving?

Yesterday, I briefly touched on the loss of family support in my life. That is the main loss I expierenced this year. No one has died in my life.  Sadly, the common link with each family member deciding to. Leave my life, is their mental health issues. Their story is not mine to tell and I want to respect their privacy. 

In March, I was homeless. Luckily, we were able to secure a rental property quickly(which is now for sale grr) .  

If anything this year has taught me, family is not always blood related. True family are the ones who stick by you through thick & thin. I am happy to say I class many close friends as family (some of them even read my blog). 

I tend to try not to dwell on the negative because it only makes me feel down, and isn't very productive. I would rather use my life lessons to help others in similar situations.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Reverb13: day3 listen to your heart

PromptToday, I want to share with you a life-changing practice I discovered with the help of Rachael Maddox during her gorgeous Do It Meaningfully challenge.

Each day for 31 days, I sat quietly for a few moments with my eyes closed and my hand on my heart and asked, “Heart: what do you need?”

And then I listened. Sometimes the answer cam in the form of a word. Sometimes an image. Sometimes a sensation.

Try this today. What does your heart have to tell you?

My heart is saying "Jess go throw some paint on a canvas. Get it all messy like". 

It also tells me that I have made the right choice in doing a diploma of community services in my year off from university.i can use my life expirences and help others.

In June (on my birthday actually ) my mother ceased all contact with me. I had suspected she didn't want much to do with me when she had to be dragged to my wedding in February. Then in September, the rest of the family decided to not speak to me. I guess for me,  family support and family in general are missing. But my heart knows, they can not be happy for me nor accept my positivity. 

I would love to live in a coastal town such as Apollo bay, a sea change would be awesome. The only thing stopping us from moving is the fact, jobs are hard to come by in that area. 

For me I have decided next year I will start a memory jar, I saw this idea on Facebook (it may also be on Pinterest I have no idea) but the idea is every few days you jot down positive memories (things that make you laugh, or happy etc) and then on New Year's Eve you read these notes with your family. 

I've also decided to try and be more organised (yes I say this every year haha but I mean it this time yes I say I mean it every year too haha) . 

I plan to just enjoy each moment, and find something to take delight in each day. 

Monday, December 2, 2013

Reverb13: day 2

Prompt: The way we nourish ourselves determines our ability to shine our light in the world. And nourishment doesn't just come in the form of food and drink and sunshine; it's equally important to nourish your spirit.

What made your soul feel most nourished this year?

I would say for a while I neglected my self, I put myself last. This led to stretching myself too thin, winding up with toxic individuals sapping the positivity out of me. I ended up realizing you need to refill that bucket inside you, that little bucket of joy, hope, positivity & happiness. You need to care for that bucket.

Yesterday we took a family trip down the great ocean road. Stopping at Erskine falls in Lorne and at Apollo bay. Taking that time to just get away and do nothing is lovely.